Your mates have said it, your girlfriend's said it, your Mum's said it... maybe it's time to face facts: you're addicted to the gym. Don't worry though, that's not something to be ashamed of, rather it's something to state proudly. Say it: 'I'm a Gym freak and proud'. I bet that felt good didn't it? Once you've finally come to terms with your true self you can relax; you're the member of an exclusive club now, a subgroup of people, feared by the rest of mankind for our freakish strength and aversion to ice cream. Kind of like x-men... sort of...
So are you really that much of a gym rat? Read the list of symptoms below and if over half of them describe you then it's fair to say you've got it bad.
- You've accidentally torn a shirt or jacket
- Your calves burned like hellfire this morning on the stairs to your office because of last night's workout
- You've turned down a night at a girl's house because you didn't want to miss another workout
- You know more famous bodybuilders than presidents or prime ministers
- You browse fitness sites at work
- You won't stay in a hotel that doesn't have a gym
- You take a bullworker with you when you visit Mum for the weekend
- You own a set of those forearm grip things
- Your favorite films are Rocky, Commando and Pumping Iron
- No one in the house can undo the taps or bottle lids after you use them
- Your own Mother thinks you're a freak
- You own a set of ancle/wrist weights
- The first thing a girl does when you pull is to squeaze your arm
- You end up topless on most nights out
- Everyone wants to challenge you to an arm wrestle
- You have been called 'Arny' or 'Big guy'
- You can't scratch your own back
- You've worked out later than 4am
- You've turned up at the gym only to find it's closed and it's Sunday and it's 1am
- The receptionist at the gym knows your name
- You have looked up 'low calorie beer' on the internet
- Your favorite song is Eye of the Tiger
- You have a picture or poster of Arnie
- You keep accidentally snapping things...
- People whince when you shake hands with them
- Your t-shirts are all too tight
- You have waxed or shaved your chest
- You have done a workout when drunk
- You have been dumped because you spend too much time at the gym
- Working out is an end in itself
- You have gone to the gym with a severe cold
- You spend half the day thinking about your next session
- Tensing your bicep is your most effective pick-up line
- You've worried a girl may only be interested in you for your body
- You say things like: 'let's blitz our arms'
- Your best friend is also your loyal gym buddy
- You have at least one training related injury
- You bore people with your stories of the gym and your health-related facts
- You've come to like the taste of raw eggs
- Your mates come to you for training tips
- You've turned down ice cream or chocolate on more than one occasion
- Your bookshelf is full of training books
- In times of desperation you have tried curling a book, suitcase, bin filled with water or other inapropriate object
- You're currently mid-way through a home workout
If you've made it this far and haven't gone off to do some press ups then at least that's something. However, chances are if you're still reading it's because the realisation has dawned on you and suddenly you see yourself in a whole new way. Don't distress my friend, welcome to the club. Now run along to the gym; we both know you want to.