How to Win An Arm Wrestle

By Adam Sinicki

Many people think of arm wrestling as the ultimate test of strength and the way to settle disputes on the matter. The truth is however that arm wrestling really has fairly little to do with strength at all, and even where it does it's mostly involving the forearms, shoulders and lats rather than the biceps. Even more concerning is the fact that there's no real way to test whether someone's cheating by getting leverage against a table leg or chair.
So those are my excuses for not winning - I have them ready prepared and they've served me quite well. Lately though, I haven't needed them since I worked out that what arm wrestling is really about is technique. Like any contest, if you know what you're doing you can beat a bigger and stronger opponent. So let's go…
First of all, when you start the arm wrestle put the corresponding foot forward under the table. This way you can't be accused of cheating but still have the adequate leverage you need. Now move your chair in close to the table so that your stomach is near the edge and have your arm similarly close to your chest so that you're as 'compressed' as possible without looking like a spaz.
Now grip your opponents hand as high up as you can towards the ends of the fingers and thumbs, this way you make your arm taller and so counteract any advantage taller opponents would otherwise have on you. At the same time curl your thumb round the back of their hand under your fingers - this will come in handy for certain moves later.
So now you're in the ultimate starting position and ready to bring the pain. Most people have no idea what they're doing in an arm wrestling contest so you'll already have a great advantage. Now when the wrestle begins 'raise' your fist so that your knuckles point at the chest of the opponent. This in turn puts their wrist at an awkward angle and prevents them doing the same to you.
Obviously the objective now is to push down, but as you do, pull your opponent's arm towards you (without moving your elbow) so as to ruin their centre of gravity and give them further to recover from. They should now be stretched across the table with their hand wrist doubled back. If this isn't enough you can then perform a 'top roll' or 'over the top' as it's known in Stallone's movie of the same name (only Stallone…), which involves 'rolling' their hand in order to rotate the wrist while moving your own hand further on top. Consider this your finishing move and pull it out once you've tired them out.
And there you have it - you've won the money and the boy is yours again! Oh no that's Over the Top again…